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Kent 'Muscles' Boswell pumps-out BTE winner! - The Real Guru

'Muscles' correctly picked the Vikes over the hapless 'Boys' in the tiebreaker to earn the victory. He will now take his lofty title of Director of Homeland Security for Newburgh, IN (that's a big terrorist target since the opening of the new wally world) travel to North Korea and have an 'in-your-face' meet with dictator Kim-Dong-Ill. Ooops, sorry, we misunderstood. 

That's a law-dude firm in south Hollywood. "Off you go mate!" The only other 7-3 pickers to throw the 'Boys' under the Viking bus ... Doug 'Double D' Dennis and Phillip 'Hot Tub' Teer. 'Hot Tub' last seen racking up 'triple travel miles' and just hoping to pitch a tent somewhere and have a good hot meal and horse liniment for his aching body. That boy is on the road so much, he'll have to vote by absentee ballot. One other 7-3 player, Gary 'the Professor' Goodaker, thought Jerry Jones had cracked the cell phone password of Bret 'Text Me Baby' Farve and picked Big D! 6-4 entries .... cool and calm on the outside but screaming with pain on the inside (kinda like Bristol Palen on Dancing with the Non-Stars) was Emily 'the Human Bruise' Begley. (She made it out of Lex Saturday night with Joker's sweaty blue jacket ... what will he do.  It'll be at least 72 degrees next week and he'll need a wrap on ... he gets cold baby on  those sidelines!!!)

Also feeling the 6-4 nip in the air was David 'Miquel' Brown, 'Tiny' Tim  Sharp, and Guest Expert Chris 'Boy' George. Also a guy who was barred from rugby tryouts in Evansville last week (his shorts were a wee bit tiny) Andrew 'Mr. Propaganda' May. (We're not sure if this stunt was another hard-hitting expose' for Fox News or just something he's always wanted to do ... film at 11).

Well lookie, lookie ... delivering a 6-4 in his brand new ride ... it's Forrest 'Rambo' Teer finally topping an 'Expert'. Me thinkey Rambo-son will be pace car for Honda-son holiday parade. With his equipped, not stripped SUV including remote control chop stix and heated lather buckets that massagie you just like little oriental girlies at the mall.

Also at  6-4 was Greg 'Ninja' Pirtle who will be making a guest appearance on the new Hawaii 5 -0oooh, if he can just find some speedos to fit. He's an adrenaline junkie ya know!

Let's take a look at those who see the glass half emptied ... including Clinton 'Big Mo' Thornberry (not been the same since popping the question) and 'Toddler' Griffin. Also 'Expert's Mack 'the Knife' and 'the Brain' ... they always seem to stiffen up after 5 picks  and just can't keep the body loose and the momentum moving forward At their age, they're just looking for any kind of movement. Kinda like facial expressions of Steve  Spurrier ... a 3-year-old sucking a lemon can't contort the eyebrows in more directions that the ole Ball Coach. Like a character out of a Harry Potter movie. The trickle down theory comes into play when looking at 4-6 players including Ralph 'D1'  Sharp and 'Jumpin' Joe Campbell. Wheeew ... 3-7 ... you send 'em, we list 'em. Susan  'Soup' Campbell and singing a bar from "I wear my sunglasses at night" Patrick 'Goat'  Carlisle. Glad you could join us ... ya know, since it's week 7. We ask so little of you.

Alrightie, I guess we're done for this week! BREAKING NEWS .... BREAKING NEWS! THIS JUST IN FROM SAN ANTONE!!! We have a 1-9 sighting! That's right ... we've learned that Aaron 'Cougar Tamer' Teer made one correct pick, surely he doesn't understand the rules of the contest. You want to  try and get 10 right each week ... not 10 per season. 'Cougar Tamer' is a little distraught ... last seen riding his pet mule 'Snookie" down to the Alamo for a last stand. Wearing his Davy Crockett coon-skin hat and George Michael chaps ... 'Cougar Tamer' is desperate for the calvary to arrive. He's determine that if he doesn't  correctly pick at least two games this week ... he will ride that rescue capsule "down" to  the bottom of the Chilean mine. A spoonful of beans and 1/2 cereal bar every 48 hours  sounds pretty good right about now! He's lower than someone having Chuck Manson "de- friend you" on Facebook. Get those picks in, week 8 is upon us ... This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it , fax 270-667-9160.

Week 8 games:
Henderson County @ Apollo
O-boro Catholic @ Ft. Campbell
North Carolina @ Miami (Fla)
Nebraska @ Oklahoma State
Oklahoma @ Missouri
Washington @ Chicago
St. Louis @ Tampa Bay
Pittsburgh @ Miami
Okland @ Denver
Tiebreaker: Georgia @ Kentucky

Posted by Karen Orange - iSurf News

 

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